Friday, November 19, 2010

Barf Blog

The other night I dreamed about really stinky shoes. And they were making me sick. And then I got up and ran to the bathroom and barfed. I had caught the stomach flu that was going around. Bleh.

Where was the worst place you puked? I got a parasite in India and ended up barfing a lot. One time was in a restaurant. I felt pretty bad for the cook, but it wasn't his fault. The other worst place was on the 10 hour flight from Amsterdam to Vancouver where I had food poisoning and spent most of those ten hours ralfing into paper bags and standing in line to use the toilet. That was like torture. You couldn't lie down and if you were in the bathroom too long, people would be banging on the door with a line-up a mile long. And if you gave up your toilet, you had no hope of getting in again anytime soon. Barf!

Have you ever been puked on? My sister has puked on me a couple times. Once in the car, and once in a hotel bed in Prince George. That was my only memory of Prince George for years and years later. Thankfully, I have a better understanding of the city now. And I also got puked on by a roommate in Mexico who ate a bad ostrich burger the night before.
I don't think I've puked on anybody though, besides my Dad. I remember getting sick in the tent trailer once, and I had the choice to puke on my little sister, my older sister, or a small empty space. I remember thinking it through very carefully. And I chose the empty space. I know, I'm a saint.

I had a very sensitive stomach when I was little, and I remember my Mom getting very mad at me one time, because I up-chucked in the car on the way to preschool because there was a hair on my lunch box. Also, no one wants to drink out of the blue plastic cup at our house anymore. I'll let you guess why. (It's been like 20 years! Get over it already!)

Anyways, everybody has tons of awesome barfing stories, so share!
Oh, and I think I am fully recovered now, or I wouldn't have been able to write this without multiple trips to the porcelain throne.


  1. I'm the sister who puked on her. Muahaha! I fully thought it through and decided you were the best option.

  2. Once my roommate came out into the living room choking and gagging. I'm a puke-triggered puker so once I heard her gagging i knew it was all over. I ran to the kitchen, grabbed her a bowl, threw it at her and ran back to the kitchen just in time to ralph all over the kitchen floor (lino instead of carpet). It was amazing. - Sara Westnedge

  3. I threw up on the girl who sat in front of my in french class in grade 9. I had oreo cookies - picture that. Turns out I had an ear infection and it hit me fast. It was my 2nd week at the school as a new student. My teacher had to give me her spare clothes to wear home, that had to walk in because I had no ride. Very embarrassing. Good news - I made friends out of that incident - who would have thought!

    Oh - and January 7, 2010. Good night of meatballs and red wine. Bad night for the truck and my husband. Let this story rest in peace.

    Glad you're feeling better Kris! ~ Brynn

  4. Hehe, good stories! I remember early morning choir practice in grade 2/3, getting ready for a big show. We were all standing on the risers singing, and our choir teacher stopped us and leaned in to ask a boy if he was feeling ok. He promptly projectile vomited right at her and over everyone underneath him. She flew backwards like a thing possessed. And then I threw up because it was so gross.

  5. I have a ditty and a poem:
    (to the tune of My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean)-
    I feel sick down in my tummy
    I want to lean over the rail
    I don't want to dirty the ocean
    So somebody bring me a pail

    Hasten, Jason, bring the basin
    Oop, slop! Bring the mop!

  6. friend Keith puked on me once. He was sitting there talking to me, and just let go all over me! Then there was the time one of you girls puked...projectile like...when you were tiny. Fortunately, I was pointing you away from me (never look a loaded baby in the mouth). I felt your tummy tighten and this very impressive stream, about 2" in diameter, came shooting out! "Okay, drop your weapon, this baby's loaded!" nyuk


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